Wow – where to start today?
I’ll start with this from Neil: If your worth comes from something outside yourself, your tendency is to control the people and factors on which your worth is based…
There’s part of me who’s a control freak, and I’ve never looked at it like this. But stopping and asking myself, where’s my self worth coming from? Is it how this – whatever it is – turns out? I can see how I need to learn to separate myself from the thing I’m trying to do, not in a bad way, but to give me the perspective I need. It’s still okay to do my best, but I’m okay if things don’t go the way I’d planned.
Check in with me in a few weeks and see how I’m doing on that one.
Okay, up next: …the need to control our children comes from the false belief that our identity and worth derives from how well our children behave…
If I’m really, truly, looking to God for my sense of identity, the judgmental looks I get when I’m out with my kids in public won’t sting… The suggestions for how to be a better parent won’t hit me so hard… I won’t feel like I’m the one in trouble when my son ends up in the principal’s office… Wow. I’m not even close.
When emotions get involved, how do I separate? Obviously, I need to find a way. Same question, right? Where is my identity coming from? Whose opinion of me is it that really counts?
I’ll end with this, because it encourages me: Your child [or anyone else] can’t stop you from being the father or mother God wants you to be.
All I can do is my best, and that’s all God asks.
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